Social Media Archives - Lisi Harrison

Swift Recovery

Lisi Harrison — Thu, 12 Mar 2015 01:23:49 +0000

Dear Lisi,

You always give the best advice. I’m in 9th grade and I have been dating my boyfriend for almost a month now, which is the longest relationship both of us have been in. For the last two weeks I’ve made him my #MCM but he still hasn’t made me his #WCW. The last #WCW he posted was a random model he likes, but shouldn’t he be posting about me by now? It makes me think he isn’t nearly as into this relationship as I am. What’s his deal?

xx Larissa

Larissa,

Let’s take a cue from Sheridan Spencer–a very insecure actress in my novel, Pretenders. When she needs guidance, Sheridan channels a celebrity. The idea is, if she acts like them she will become like them, and her troubles will melt away. The thing is, there are many different ways to handle your issue. You can put yourself out there and tell him how you feel. You can play games that–if played well–will show him how you feel. Or you can be cool and act like you don’t care one way or the other. So who’s a girl to channel? What single person can help you play out all three of these possibilities?

The problem is which Taylor should you be?

YOU COULD BECOME TAYLOR ONE: “You Belong To Me”

You feel slighted, insulted, and dissed. Your feelings are hurt and you’re not one to play games. You tell him exactly how you feel. If he loves you he’ll realize what he’s done, and a 3D collage of you will put his sad little #WCW of said model to shame. If he doesn’t love you, he will once he realizes how open you are about your feelings.

YOU COULD BECOME TAYLOR TWO: “We Are Never Getting Back Together”

Are you seriously going to put up with that? Gawd, I hope not. So what’s the plan? You can’t do something predictable like replace his pic with a model’s. No, you’re going to #MakeHimSuffer. You’re going to #TeachHimALesson. You’re going to #MakeoutWithHisBestfriendRightInFrontOfHim. And then you’re going to #PostThat!

Not only will it teach him not to mess with you, it will teach the world not to mess with you either. Two birds, one stone. #Done.

OR YOU COULD BECOME TAYLOR THREE: “Shake It Off”

This Taylor would start by knowing her audience–a teenaged dude. Did you see the movie Grease? Did you see how Danny acted in front of Sandy when his buddies were around? Like he didn’t even know her. Why? Because he’s terrified of being made fun of by his bros. Immature as it may seem, guys are supposed to act tough. Sex is the ultimate; love is for wuss-bags. Does he believe this? No. Does he mean it when he tells you how much he likes you? Yes. Does he know he’s going to be berated if he IG’s about his crush? YES! But a hot model is safe. It shows his bros that he’s not wearing his heart on his sleeve (Get it, heart-on?) He’s just being a dude. If that’s the worst thing he does, let him get away with it. It means he’s acting his age. Accept it. He’s just channeling a typical teenaged boy.

If he’s mean to you, disrespectful, rude, or anything else that makes you question his true feelings, skip over Taylor one and become Taylor two. In the meantime, you could stop following him and stick to life in the third dimension. That’s where the real magic happens.

TTYW,

Lisi

PS. Because hash tagging is my style, my #WCW for the week is the first person to comment this post. Expect a shout out.

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Love/HATE!

Lisi Harrison — Wed, 13 Feb 2013 23:49:45 +0000

I’d like to begin today’s Blah-g with a poem…

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

I hate ~~Valentines Day~~,

How about you?

If you are one of the ~~few~~ people who enjoy this Hallmark holiday, forgive me. But I have been ~~dumped, disappointed, stood-up, bored, food poisoned, acne infested, dateless, depressed~~ through decades of them and the novelty has worn off. But hey, if you’re into it, enjoy ~~if you possibly can~~.

For those of you who are staying home ~~like me~~ because you ~~have nothing else to do~~ would rather read, check out my new Tumblr.

If you are ~~totally clueless~~ unfamiliar with this photo and information-sharing site, don’t beat yourself up. Only ~~93.7 million blogs and 43 billion posts~~ a few ~~fashionistas, bands, news channels, business owners~~ people are using it. And now I am too.
Pintrest is for my characters, Facebook is for my fans, Twitter is for my finds, and Tumblr is going to be for all things ~~pretentious~~ literary. This is where I’ll share the things I love about reading, ~~online shopping~~, writing, books, and quotes, ~~most of which I will have written or plagiarized.~~

~~Follow me now~~ I invite you to take a look. ~~Follow me, I said!~~

Http://lisiharrison.tumblr.com

And please, have a very happy Valentine’s Day. ~~Cupid still wears a diaper and it smells like heartache!~~

TTYW,

Lisi

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Um, Lisi, Did You Get Lasik Eye Surgery?

Lisi Harrison — Thu, 06 Sep 2012 01:39:23 +0000

No.
Then what’s with the new site?
Simple. I’ve been rocking the LH Wallet for five years

and, like most wallets, it needed change. (Yep, pun intended. New site, same old humor.)

I know, I know. It looks sooooo different. And different can be scary. So place your virtual hand in mine and let’s explore our new hang spot together.

Look up. Top right corner.

Facebook? Hello, friend.
Twitter? Tuh-weet.
Pintrest? I thought you’d never ask.

One click and we’re connected. I realize you know how it works. But did you know that I have quit being a Twitter quitter? Pinky-swear. I will be tweeting constantly now, updating you on my latest #SIC (Sharing Is Caring) obsession. SIC is a quick look at something ah-mazing that I am compelled to share with you. Now look right. The five most recent tweets will be displayed over there, in the sidebar.

Wanna see what I see in my head? (Just the writing stuff, don’t worry.) Then follow me on Pinterest. All of my new characters have boards! Go on, introduce yourself to the Phoenix Five characters (Sheridan, Jagger, Lily, Vanessa, Duffy). Then say hello to the original 1962 Dirty Book Club members (Gloria, Marjorie, Dot, Liddy). The present day member boards are in the works so keep checking back for more. I am obsessed!

Now look all the way up. The Navigation Bar has my current bio, info on the books I’ve written and where they can be purchased online, and press interviews. Oh, see that button that says Follow? Click on that if you want to know when I’ve posted my Wednesday Blah-G. Yep. We’ve taken the guess work out of it. You’re welcome.

Look down.

Your Comments will be your comments. No surprise there.
My Comments will be weekly shout outs, birthday wishes, or other things I might want to mention based on your comments. I know, I need to get a dry erase board or something cuter than an index card. A photographer would also be nice. So would a bathroom break because I seriously have to pee. If anyone else has to go please do it now…

…Okay, I’m back.

Chihuahuawatch is really just an excuse to exploit my dog Bee Bee’s
ah-dorableness. And hawnestly? The title cracked us up. Go on, say it out loud. How fun is that?

Um, that was not hypothetical. I really want to know how fun it was. I want to know what you think of everything. After all, I built this site for you. (Truth? Alisha, my brilliant office elf did the building. I just barfed ideas all over her cute outfits and then went back to writing.) So start filling up your spacious new comments section. Homework can wait!

TTYW,
Lisi V 2.0

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