I took to the streets of Laguna Beach and in the least creepy way possible asked four surfer/skater dudes ranging in ages from 14-16 to reveal the meaning behind a few different actions. The results might surprise you. Read the final data below:

The Study Participants 

GUY #1 – Anthony – 16 years-old

GUY #2 – Zak – 14 years-old

GUY #3 – Garrett – 16 years-old

GUY #4 – Brian – 15 years-old 

The Guy Behavior 

1) Not returning a text (after a significant period of time)

GUY #1 – Anthony –

“If I stopped returning a girl’s texts she was either texting me too much or maybe I got distracted by something else and forgot.”

[other guys nod their heads]

Me: “But when you weren’t busy or distracted anymore, wouldn’t you remember the girl you were texting and get back to her?”

GUY #3 – Garrett-

“Not if I wasn’t fully interested in the conversation or getting to know her more. Sometimes you can tell if you’d get along with a girl just by how you text with her.”

GUY #4 – Brian –

“If I don’t really like a girl, I’ll just stop texting and she will eventually get the hint. We don’t know each other well enough to have a whole talk about why we’re not talkling anymore. She’ll just get the hint.”

[other guys nod their heads]

GUY #2 – Zak –

“Sometimes I just don’t know what to say to keep the texting interesting and I figure stop when you’re ahead so you don’t look stupid.”

2) Acting interested in a girl one week and then not the next

GUY #2 – Zak –

“This one is totally me. I get over girls so quickly. But it’s not their fault or anything, I just don’t want a girlfriend but it’s still fun to get attention from girls.”

GUY #3 – Garrett-

“Yeah, I’d say I probably was interested in the girl but then got to know her better and realized we didn’t have enough in common or didn’t have anything to talk about.”

GUY #4 – Brian –

“I think this one usually means the guy has other options and is spreading his attention over several different prospects. It’s hard to keep it straight.”

[other guys nod their heads]

GUY #1 – Anthony –

“What’s so bad about being into a girl one week and then not the next?”

3) Flirting with a girl but not ask her out

GUY #3 – Garrett –

“I like to feel out the situation with a girl and see how into me she is. I don’t want to ask her out if there’s a huge change she will reject me. Flirting is also just fun. It doesn’t have to mean anything though.”

GUY #1 – Anthony –

“Well, pride.”

Me: “Can you explain?”

GUY #1 – Anthony –

“Yeah, if I’m going to ask a girl out I would want to do it right and take her somewhere decent. I don’t make enough money to do that.”

Me: “What if the girl doesn’t care what the date looks like or how much money you have?”

GUY #1 – Anthony –

“I care. I don’t want to go on dates until I have a job and a car.”

GUY #2 – Zak –

“There’s no way I could go on dates with every girl I flirt with. I flirt with so many. Like what Garrett said, it doesn’t mean too much.”

GUY #4 – Brian –

[shrugs] “I hardly flirt with anyone. I really don’t find many girls at school hot but when I do flirt it probably means I want to ask you out.”

Me: “Ask ME out?”

[Garrett, Zak, and Anthony laugh]

GUY #4 – Brian –

[blushing] “No! ‘You’ as in the girl I’m flirting with… I don’t know. I don’t flirt much.”

4) Asking a girl to watch a movie in

GUY #1 – Anthony –

“This definitely means I want to make out with the girl. Or at least try. It’s the easiest place to try.”

[the other guys agree in unison]

5) Taking a girl you’re into on a date and then never calling her afterwards 

GUY #3 – Garrett –

“This one’s easy. He probably just wasn’t super into her after the date ended. Or maybe he was dating a bunch of girls at once and not wanting to stick around very long with any one of them.”

GUY #1 – Anthony –

“I’d say he probably was kinda into her but wasn’t 100% positive he liked her so maybe he’d call her in the future just to make sure either way.”

Me: “What if you called the girl a few weeks later and hang out again, but then you never call her after that.”

GUY #1 – Anthony –

“OK, then I just probably wasn’t all that into it after all. Got my answer.”

GUY #4 – Brian –

“Dude, that’s harsh.”

GUY #1 – Anthony –

“Well? It’s the truth. Sometimes you’re not into it.”

GUY #4 – Brian –

“Fair.”

GUY #2 – Zak –

“Yeah, I’d have to agree. If a guy is really into a girl he’s going to call or flirt or make it obvious he’s into her. You wouldn’t want her to get taken off the market by some douche before you had a chance to ask her out.”

Me: “So, you wouldn’t wait a few weeks to hang out again after going on a date with a girl you were really into?”

GUY #2 – Zak –

“I don’t really date, but I mean, no I wouldn’t make her wait a few weeks. Maybe a week so I don’t seem too eager. I wouldn’t want to lose my chance with her though.”

—-

Straight from the mouths of the more basic sex, ladies. Send all your questions, guy related or not, my way. They might show up on one of the weekly blah-g posts.

TTYW,

Lisi

The post Guy Basics appeared first on Lisi Harrison.

I will try to get to all of your questions eventually, especially if you start them with Lisi, you give the best advice…, but this week my crushed heart goes out to Biebs Girl.

Lisi, you give the best advice… What do you think about dating someone who’s younger than you and way shorter? This really sweet guy is a Freshman and he told me he had a crush on me. I’m a Junior and my friends always say it’d be soooo wrong to even think about it. But I am. I’m about 5″4 and I’m pretty sure he’s like 5’4 or maybe slightly taller or shorter. Its just kinda awk how he’s a height close to mine. What do you think?

If I forgot what it was like to be in high school I’d say something not-at-all helpful like, “Who cares what your friends think. If he’s a good guy and you like each other that’s all that should matter.” Technically, that’s true but it sucks as advice because when you’re in high school friends’ opinions do matter. I’m not saying it’s right. I’m just saying I accept it because if I didn’t I’d be feeding you that crap line and wondering why it didn’t help.

First order of business: My guess is these friends of yours are single or unhappy. If they were happy in relationships of their own they wouldn’t care who you liked as long as you were happy too. Know that. Don’t ever forget it. EVER! Some friends can be very supportive as long as they’re happy. When they’re not, many have a fear of being left behind and they will do and say whatever it takes to keep you from moving on without them.

Next: Do you really like this guy? Does he make you smile out loud? If so, Massie Block has a question for you:

Would you rather hang with an awesome guy your friends don’t think is tall enough to ride the roller coaster OR miss out on what could be a great time to keep your friends from yapping behind your back?

It takes courage to do things your friends don’t approve of. If you don’t find that courage now ,you’ll have to find it eventually because you won’t always agree on everything. And at some point in your life that’s going to have to be okay or you will have no clue who you are and you certainly won’t be happy.

Assuming you find the courage to live life for yourself and not your friends (it’s hard at your age, I get it) then it’s all how you spin it. Instead of acting all unsure and insecure show them how much fun dating a young same-sized guy can be. Put on your advertising hat and sell it. Start by telling them they are judging him based on the year his parents had sex. Gross, I know, but that’s really what it comes down to. It’s called ageism. No different than judging someone based on the color of their skin or the god they pray to.

Next, think of all the celeb couples who rocked that trend. Demi and Ashton, anyone? Fine, it didn’t end well but they had a great run. My husband is two years younger than me. My friend Noel married an ah-mazing guy who is six years younger than her. We live in a culture that worships youth. Make that work for you, sister. Be a Junior-cougar. Start a Junior Cougar Club. Junior girls who proudly date younger guys. Make it trend. Own it.#Juniorcougar

Find out if he has any friends that are interested in one of your friends. A double date perhaps? Maybe the young ones will get cheaper prices on movie tickets.

It hard to go against the social norms. Ask anyone who ever made a difference in this world. They’ll tell you.

Keep me posted!

TTYW,

Lisi

So many issues, so few Wednesdays. Keep sending your questions. I’ll answer another one next week.

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