Intention Deficit Disorder

intention

A few years ago, I was having one of my many panic attacks while trying to finish one of my many books before one of my many deadlines. Not one to wallow in my own suffering, I looked for help and found Candice. I’m sure I’ve written about her before. She is a life coach and really helped me look at my stresses in a new way so I could manage them. One of my biggest issues was Life vs. Work. As a writer, you really need to enter what I call The Cone Of Silence and stay there for many straight hours.

There are no texts inside the cone. No phone calls. No e-mails. No paying bills. No online shopping. No visits from friends. No doing dishes. No haircuts. No waxes. No mani’s or pedi’s. No reading. No listening to music with lyrics. No helping old people or ducklings cross the road.

It’s a cone.

A silent one.

And there’s only room for me.

So when do all those other things get done? Not on the weekends. The weekends are for my kids. Not at night. That’s when I decompress. Candace’s suggestion? Create one non-writing day every week–preferably the same day–and make it about your to-do list.

I made mine Wednesdays. And I’m so in love with it I want to marry it. This is the day I do all the other stuff that life’s vomiting in my face, and it’s worked incredibly well.

Another thing I recently discovered is Intent.com

The website was created by Mallika Chopra (yes, daughter of Deepak, but she is so much more). She wrote a book called Living With Intent that has brought so much meaning to my life. For those of you who are inundated with exams and not quite ready for a summer reading list, I suggest you join the website and get the app. It’s a game-changer.

Taking a moment to think about what you want each day really helps you get it. It’s so simple and so effective. And it doesn’t have to be spiritual or deep in any way. Look for mine, you’ll see. It can be about anything–no one judges. In fact, everyone supports.

You can also:

* Share your intents with other community members.
* Receive encouraging comments on your intents.
* Show your support for other people’s intents.
* Adopt other people’s intents that you can relate to.
* Sync your account with Twitter and Facebook so that your intents are automatically shared with your Twitter and Facebook friends.
* Reaffirm you intents every day so you stay on top of your goals.
* Track the intents that you completed or accomplished.
* Add inspirational or informational photos and videos to your intent.

Let me know when you’re on so I can follow you.

I intend to TTYW,

Lisi

Grit or Get Off The Pot

im/possible

“Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure you are not, in fact, just surrounded by a**holes.” – William Gibson.

Have you ever shared your life’s grand plan with someone and in an instant your dreams were dashed with negativity? We all encounter discouraging naysayers on our path, but it’s particularly difficult to stay focused in reaching our goals when those closest to us can’t or won’t be our support system along the way. Danielle is experiencing this right now and commented about it on my Facebook page. Here’s her story: I’ve wanted to become a writer for quite some time. The only problem is my family doesn’t support me in my decision. They say things that really make me feel like I won’t be able to make it. I get tons of support at school with my teachers and I’m grateful for that, but my family makes jokes at my expense that make me feel self conscious for wanting to write. It’s gotten so bad that I don’t think I’ll be able to become a writer anymore. Any advice?  People who try to talk you down from a dream are usually working from a place of fear. It isn’t necessarily their fault. They might be repeating discouraging words said to them long ago, or they might be too scared in their own life to follow their passion. It’s crucial that you keep this in mind. Remind yourself it’s their insecurity and like a virus, you will catch it if you don’t build up your immunity. Here’s how:

Shut them down.

Tell them to keep their negativity to themselves. If they keep this up you will never dedicate a novel to them. Ne-ver! You could also try giving them a taste of it. Crush their goals and dreams just for fun. See how they like it. Infect them with their own negativity. Then (wait for it…) write a short story about it. Everything you experience—better or worse—is material. At the very least take notes on their behavior. The sound of their voices when they judge. Their facial expressions. The sound of their laughter. Show them, with your writing, how antagonistic they are.

Become Boobs. Now Find Your Bra.

Like a pair of boobs you need support. So go find a few bras. By this I mean people who support you. Share your writing with the teachers who believe in you. Join or start a writing club. Become an online member of a writing community. Read about writers. Read about writing. Surround yourself with other people who share the vision. That’s the bug you want to catch.
goals

Don’t dream it. Do it. 

Right now writing is your dream, but you should make it your reality. Decide upon smaller tasks instead of focusing solely on the final work. Write them down, tack them up on a wall near your desk. Look at those reminder notes every morning and put at least one of them into effect. Maybe that means writing a short story, putting a book of poems together, completing specific writing exercises each week, studying two books on the craft per month. Your family will see you working at achieving your goal and hopefully will respect your vision more and more. Or they won’t. (See: Shut Them Down.) The most important thing a writer can have—more important that talent, skill, education—is GRIT! Stick with it. Thicken that skin. Shut out the noise. Cliche? Yes. But oh so true.

butler quote Now go kick some ass. TTYW, Lisi