I get messages every day from fans asking for my advice and I try my best to answer as many questions as possible here on the blah-g. Most of my responses stem from personal experience, but I also tend to search around online for any additional pieces of wisdom that might help you. In doing so, I’ve come across a LOAD of terrible advice out there, especially when it comes to relationships. So terrible in fact, I shudder thinking one of you might someday stumble upon said harmful adages and mistake them for genuinely helpful answers. Below are the top three worst pieces of advice I’m come across so far.
1) “Play hard to get.”
Having a little mystery or intrigue about yourself is great, but rejecting someone’s advances for the sheer sake of playing hard to get? That’s a tricky game. If you get a phone call or text, don’t drop everything to get back to that person, but do reply when you get the chance. You don’t have to change your life around at the drop of a dime to accommodate someone who’s pursuing you, but you also shouldn’t wait three days to return a text in the hope your aloofness will make you seem more attractive. If you’re interested in getting to know someone, show it.
2) “Love means never having to say I’m sorry.”
Whoever believes apologies don’t exist once you’re in love has never been in love before. Being mindful of your partner’s feelings and accountable for the times when you leave them feeling less than great is a part of being in a relationship. We should of course apologize for any words or careless actions, even if we weren’t intentionally trying to be hurtful. If you’re a human reading this, then you are absolutely going to make mistakes and–intentionally or unintentionally–will do things you’ll need to apologize for at one time or another.
3) “Women hold all the power in relationships because they are the sexual gatekeepers.”
Okay, I get why this adage exists, but that doesn’t mean it’s a sound statement. Girls should of course only do what they are comfortable doing with their partner and reserve the right to make that choice when it’s appropriate. But no one should hold more power than the other in a relationship based on which genitals they have. Relationships are about teamwork and building one another up, not exercising control over the other person by leveraging, say, a make out sesh for power.
Don’t. Follow. ANY of the above.
What do you think? What anti advice did I miss? Let me know in the comments section.