Don’t Rush the Crush

Not even my looming Dirty Book Club deadline can keep me from responding to all of your Q&A submissions, except for possibly overlooking them in the comments section. I’ve answered my way through most of your questions (can you believe it?), but if I’ve somehow skipped yours, comment it below so I can give you the attention you deserve.

Today’s blah-g post goes out to Kiki. Here’s what she asked:

Dear lisi,
Lisi you always give the best advice… So I’m having some boy trouble.
There is this guy at my school who I have liked for a while and I just realized that he and one of my friends have a ‘thing’ going on, he likes her and she likes him. And so I’m trying to move on and there is this other guy in my school who is continuously flirting with me and everyone thinks he likes me. So Like any other teenage girl I’m following the advice from all the cliche high school movies where the girl was so obsessed with one guy that she didnt see the perfectly good one standing right in front of her, and I refuse to be one if those girls. So I WOULD totally make a move for it if this guy wasn’t my best friends crush 😁😁😁. WHAT SHOULD I DOOO!!!
-yours truly,

Kiki, I am here to come to your aid, although you’ve already answered half of the question yourself. My advice to you is simple: keep stepping away from the crush. I know it’s incredibly disappointing when a long-time crush remains unrequited because he develops eyes for someone else, especially a friend in your circle. But your instincts were spot on when you decided to start moving on and opening up your sights for someone more available. Things get messy when you pine over a boy your friend might be dating, so don’t do that to yourself. It won’t be easy. You might feel a pang in your heart when you see them together, but let it be a reminder you’ve got a heart that works, and then give it to someone who deserves it.

You’ve got options. Is this new flirtatious boy someone you think you could truly like? Or is it just his interest in you that’s intriguing? If it’s the former, then problem solved. Get to know him and see where things go. Maybe you’ve met your match. But if he’s only on your radar now because you’re in boyfriend-hunting mode and the crush didn’t work out, I advise you to step away from this boy, too. He won’t be any consolation until you’ve completely moved your heart on from your soon-to-be former crush. Take your time. There’s no rush. People throw out this cliche because there’s truth in it: it’s when you stop looking that you find what you need.

Hope that helps!






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