Blog posts in the category: Uncategorized

Phantom of the Oprah.

During last Sunday’s Golden Globes, Oprah told millions that, “Speaking your truth is the most powerful tool we all have.” Memes, reposts and Reese fans agreed. So did I. Until I didn’t.

Oprah’s declaration haunted me well into Tuesday. Not because it was so spot on, but because it felt off. Sure if speaking one’s truth means owning your true nature and living without shame, I’m all for it.

But isn’t that living a truth?

Speaking one’s truth means articulating what is true for you. And that’s not always appropriate. If I spoke my truth all the time the “powerful tool” I’d get would be a tire iron to the skull.

When it comes to truth-speaking, the real tool is …

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Writing Under the Influence

There are two things that some authors do–and do well–that have always eluded me.

  1. They write under the influence of drugs or alcohol.
  2. They write without an outline or plan.

In all my fifteen years of authoring I have never done either. Until right now. Right now I am doing both. That’s probably why I just used the word “authoring.”

You see, two weeks ago I had knee replacement surgery.

That’s why I haven’t blogged. I thought I’d keep it up from the hospital so I brought my laptop and a Marc Jacobs bag filled with good intentions. This coming from the girl who packs gym clothes on book tour, but never works out. The same girl who

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I’m Too Skinny For This Blog.

What I am about to share is my own experience. I’d also bet my life, and my afterlife, that it has been yours too.

Last Saturday night, while blasting the Salt-N-Pepa station on Pandora, I took one last look in the mirror before heading to a party. My hair was the right amount of tousled. My slip dress and satin smoking jacket were on point. My black Vans howled, “whimsical comfort” at the super moon. I was red lipstick ready and eager to Shoop-oop-a-doop.

Upon arrival, I was ushered onto the private deck of a beachside bar. Think bungalow’s, bartenders, a decadent spread of food, and hilarious friends. And yet, the following thoughts tsunami’ed into my brain:

So and So’s

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No Thanks, Thanksgiving.

If Thanksgiving is a judge, I am requesting permission to approach the bench. Maybe I’ll be held in contempt or maybe a new precedent will be formed. In this mock trial you, my dear reader, are all twelve jurors. You decide.

My proposal? I would like the American people to add a dash of No Thanks to Thanksgiving 2017 by saying nay to five toxic behaviors. If you do, I guarantee you will have five more things to be grateful for.

The NO THANKS Thanksgiving List.

  1. I happen to know that there is someone in your life that doesn’t make you feel good. They have you believing you’re not good enough. That if you were only (insert) they would treat
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Positively Negative.

I try to be positive. I really do. But here’s the thing about acceptance, optimism, and half-full glasses: they’re no fun. It’s the challenges, mishaps, and wipeouts that made life dramatic and hilarious. So when it comes to writing, looking on the dark side is my attitude of choice.

As many of you know, I’ve started tinkering around with a new idea. And with that comes a ton of character development. So this morning I made a Bug List. Why? Because my fictional friends need flaws and quirks and petty irritations. It’s those details that make them memorable. So don’t be surprised if you come across the any of these annoying-to-me traits in my next novel.

  1. The term “awesome sauce.”
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Writing The Ship

I finished my final manuscript for The Dirty Book Club in January 2017 ready for a break. After thirty-two novels and a grey-green complexion all I wanted to do was tend to my hair–the wanted and the unwanted–and re-enter society, tragic as it has become. At that point I could only imagine what life was like outside my head and I was so over imagining. I wanted reality. So much so that I spoke to a local shop owner about working at her boutique. Dressing living people instead of fictional characters seemed like a positive first step.

But my work on the Dirty Book Club was far from over. Proofs needed proofing. My dying social media sites needed defibrillators. Then …

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Skyper Active.

If you had pulled up beside me at a stop light last Thursday at approximately 8:40am PST, you would have assumed one of the following:

  1. I was having a seizure.
  2. I was head-banging to some serious devil worshipping metal.
  3. The seat of my Volvo doubled as an electric chair and I was being executed.

The truth is I had just returned home from book tour and was having a complete breakdown. Primal sobs, soaked face, snot bubbles, and a tortured soliloquy about burn out. At one point I remember yelling, “And on top if it all, I have to make an f-ing wax appointment because hair just keeps on growing!” Yeah, I know, Laguna Beach problems.

Typically, I love heading …

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Listen up, Ladies!

Hello my friends,
I’m so sorry I missed posting on Wednesday. I was away on book tour and the week got away from me. But alas, I will make it up to you with some mixed media action. That’s right, I recorded a podcast with XOXO After Dark and we had quite the conversation.

The Darkcast ladies of XOXO After Dark got dirty talking about dirty books, of course! Abby, Kate and Lauren  discussed the ways in which erotic books are empowering and how female storytelling can change the world. Plus, we talked about how I chose the books I mention in The Dirty Book Club, and how to join the online Dirty Book Club I’m running on Facebook! Finally, …

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Squad Goals: Five Ways to Find Your Tribe.

 

Are you wandering the social desert looking for your tribe? Want to branch out because you’re not being treated like the wonder woman that you are? Can you relate to these comments?

Lisi, what’s your take on friend making? Do you think it is like love where people say if you look for it, you won’t find it? What’s a good way to find friends? -Kiana

 I don’t have a lot of friends, and feel really awkward when I meet new people. I don’t feel like I fit in. Mostly like a misfit. I probably have like 2 friends but they’re not even similar to me. Hopefully Lisi can help us both! -Lauren

Making true  friends can feel …
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Four Reasons Why Writing For Adults Sucked.

            When I heard an author say that it took years to complete their latest book, I assumed they were lazy. I mean, I wrote thirty-one YA novels in ten years. During that time I also got a puppy, moved across country, had two kids, went for (and failed) my California Driver’s license, went for it again (cheated) and passed, leased cars, bought a house, decorated said house, and did all the other things adult humans do to thrive and stay out of prison.

Then, in 2011, I had an idea for a novel. An adult novel inspired by my own dirty book club and I would call it, of course, The Dirty Book Club. Thanks to my track record, …

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