Customize A Custom

We live in a culture of customs. Birthday parties, Sweet Sixteens, Engagements, Weddings, Baby Showers… And each one comes with its own traditions that define it. Cakes, diamond rings, tossed bouquets, tiny clothes and tea sandwiches… This is good if you value tradition, but if you’re more of a trailblazer it can feel restricting and uninspired. This letter from Madi Williams says it all. She wrote:

“Lisi, did u have a sweet 16 party? Are they all they are cracked up to be. Cuz this girl (mean girl) in my spanish class is all like “I’ve driven before, I’m having a sweet 16 party and…..”
Me: (mentally) no one cares. But honestly I do care, I mean people are having the time of there lives and I’m not there! So what do I do throw a party of my own or what? I mean you are kinda an expert in this area. My ideal bday is Sixbucks and shopping with my mom, but the girls at my school don’t care about that. The bigger and flashier the party, the better.”

Madi, I did not have a Sweet 16. It wasn’t really my thing (Read: my parents thought it was unnecessary). But I will say there is no gaping hole in my life as a result of that. I do understand the pressure you are feeling to fit in and keep up so I will present you with three options. Each one is designed to honor your TRUE wish (shopping and Sixbucks with your mom–LOVE IT!) while helping you find a way to make it your own.

PACKAGE #1

"Hyatt Resorts Launches 'HyaTTeen Suite 16' Luxury Slumber Party - from Limo Rides to Lounging Pool-Side, Teens Celebrate In Style" - Apparently this is a real thing!

“Hyatt Resorts Launches ‘HyaTTeen Suite 16′ Luxury Slumber Party – from Limo Rides to Lounging Pool-Side, Teens Celebrate In Style” – Apparently this is a real thing!

S&S with your mom. Get a hotel room and invite your closest friends to sleep over and hang with you. Put a sign on the door that says SUITE 16 and live it up. Swim in the pool, get room service, use a new towel every time you wash. Have a blast with the girls you love instead of trying to throw a party for a bunch of people who don’t matter.

PACKAGE #2

The Neon Color Run! Known as the happiest 5k on the planet

The Color Run! Known as the happiest 5k on the planet

Runners from last year's Color Run.

Runners from last year’s Color Run.

S&S with your mom. Is there a charity you love or a cool trip you want to raise money for? What about a car? Start training to run, ride, walk, hop, roll… sixteen miles. Have your friends meet you at the finish line and have a party outside. Instead of gifts ask for donations to your cause. It would be fun to team up with a friend for this one.

PACKAGE #3

For Madi

S&S with your mom. That’s it. It’s all you want. OWN IT! (Ask her if you can buy an extra outfit if you don’t have a party. Think of the money she’ll be saving. She can’t say no to that.) Then wear that outfit to someone else’s Sweet 16 and BREAK HEARTS!!!

 

Let me know what you decide.

TTYW,

Lisi

 

 

 

 

Boobs and Bathingsuits

Hello there. I was hoping that title would get your attention.

Okay fine, I’ll own it. I dropped the Blah-g yesterday. I’m sorry. But I happened to be inside this theater attending an ah-mazing concert and I didn’t have time to post.

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If you don’t know this band of three badass and extremely talented sisters, make it your business to get to know them. Not at this exact second, but the moment you finish reading this.

The other thing that consumed me yesterday was my research for The Dirty Book Club. The novel is set in present-day California, but there are a lot of flashbacks. The one I am working on now takes place in 1973 so I ordered a bunch of archived magazines from that time so I could get a feel for pop culture and fashion during that era.

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This is what I learned…

1) Swimsuit models didn’t have to spend their salaries on boobs. Flat was where it was at. Much sexier if you ask me.

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2) One dollar went a long way. SPOILER ALERT: Sheridan Spencer reads How To Be Your Own Best Friend in Pretenders 2: License To Spill (June 2014). See it down there?

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3) Jell-O mold = “Nutrition.”

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4) Photos weren’t shopped. Models had facial movement when they smiled and their skin tones weren’t even. The horror!

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5) This cigarette ad is my favorite. Not only does it look like that guy is once inch away from setting his shag rug on fire, and not only do the tracks on his corduroy pants look like they have been raked in a Zen garden, but there is something in this photo that defies all logic. Can you figure out what it is?

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Try. Really try. But if you are too impatient because you want to go and download Haim ,check the bottom of this blog for the answer.

 

TTYW,

Lisi

 

(Their cigarettes are lit but no smoke. Man, the ’70s were a magical time.)

Guest Post on the Office Elf Blog – Writer’s Life

Lisi is submerged in The Dirty Book Club so I’ve written you all another novel-length guest blog post over on the Office Elf blog. One of the blog commenters, Kimberly, asked me a few questions about my own creative path and how I came to work with Lisi. Read about the adventures toils mundane experiences career path of one young writer here.

Lisi will return next week!

xx

Alisha, Office Elf

 

POP QUIZ

Pop Culture Junkie

If there is one thing my adoring fans always want to know it’s, “Lisi, why do you look so much older than your real age of eighteen?” If there is one more thing it’s, “Your books are always full of pop culture references. How do you manage to keep up?”

While I can’t make sense of premature aging, I can tell you how I keep a firm grip on all things shallow and trivial. Her name is Alisha. She is my much appreciated office elf. And one of her many responsibilities is to generate what I call The Pop Doc. It’s a weekly round up of pop culture news and it’s FAB!! Instead of wasting time trolling the web for the latest scandals and outrages, Alisha does it for me. Then she compiles her findings into a lovely document and emails it to me. Awesome, right?

My latest Pop Doc (week of March 26th) was a great one. One that left me wondering if I am now the queen of all useless knowledge, behind the curve, or at one with the general public. So I am going to quiz you to see what you know.

Good luck.

1. Justin Bieber was awarded the honor of Juno Fan Choice Award for the fourth year in a row, but chose not to attend to accept the award. When his name was announced, it was overshadowed by a chorus of boos from the crowd. The last time he was booed at an awards show was _________ ?

2. ___________  is joining “The Voice.” The show made the announcement on Monday via Twitter. _____ will rotate in for season 7, following ______’s exit.

3.  Who is launching a new fragrance called “That Moment“?

4. The new book series, Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them is a spin-off of which not-very-popular-and-not-well-known existing series?

5. Which celebrity couple just announced their separation?

 

Go to Alisha’s Office Elf blog for answers and the rest of the story.

Leave me a comment and let me know how you did.

 

TTYW,

Lisi

 

Quit For Brains

One of the biggest pieces of advice I give aspiring writers is to outline. And yet here I am completely free-styling this blah-g because I have nothing to say today. Don’t take it personally, my current manuscript is also feeling the chill. It’s just one of those weeks where I find myself struggling. Words are sticky. Ideas are hiding. My internal settings are on slo-mo and I can’t seem to get them back to kick-ass.

Do you think that makes me doubt my career choice? Question my ability to make my looming deadline? Make me wish I could get that clothing airstream I’ve always dreamed of and walk off the job?

YES! YES IT DOES.

And so I will quit. I will stop writing because I have nothing interesting to say. I will also stop because the word “interesting” is one of the least descriptive words in the world and I just used it. In public. So this is me quitting. Bye. Of course, I will be back at my desk tomorrow. Because I’m responsible and not the beneficiary of a trust fund? Maybe. Because I don’t have an airstream? Given. But mostly because talent doesn’t make a writer good. Desire does. And I have plenty of that. Starting tomorrow.

How was that for an off-the-top-of-my-head riff. Did I just compose jazz?

TTYW,

Lisi

 

HELP WANTED

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