Study this!

You have to go to school. You have to do homework. You have to get good grades or your parents won’t let you drive. So you do. But that doesn’t mean you have to like it.

But what if you could like it? What if you wanted to learn and study? What if you wanted to write papers and break off into groups to “discuss?” It’s possible, if you like what you’re being taught.

Behold the Pretenders Educator’s Guide. This baby is filled with dozens of ways teachers can school you on my series. Instead of writing a paper on Romeo and Juliet you could be writing about Lily and Duffy.


Pretenders Educator's Guide

Pretenders Educator's Guide Pretenders Educator's Guide Pretenders Educator's Guide



I know this year is winding down but it’s not too late to give a copy to your teacher or principal so they can jump on it for next year. The best part? I will go to your classroom and participate in the lesson. I don’t care where your school is, the more inconveniently located the better. I can watch you act out monologues from characters, read your essays, grade your essays, or discuss the writing process in general. I’m up for anything. Let’s hope your teacher is too. Print it, email it, leave in on the windshield of their fuel-efficient car. Just do it!

See you in class,









Series Strength

Hi everyone,

Alisha here, guest blogging for Lisi today. We’ve decided to start posting the guest spots on her main page so you can find it at more than one site. The Office Elf blog is still up and will be the second home for these posts but, honestly, I was getting lonely over there and wanted a little more Lisi connectivity. Go Team LH! 

Some people love to throw around the adage “less is more” without knowing where that saying actually comes from. We saw it first in a Robert Browning poem  called Andrew del Sarto (Called The “Faultless Painter”), which tells the story of the Renaissance artist who possessed great technical skill in his craft, but lacked soul. You know… soul. That elusive aspect… that je ne sais qoui… that infusion of heart from the artist who created the work that hits you in the sweet spot and keeps you coming back for more. If you’re talking about a painting or interior design, I can understand how “less is more” is a popular critique. But if we’re talking about a story filled with the hearts and souls of its characters, more is most definitely more.

Ask any fangirl who just finished reading the very last page in one of her favorite author’s recent books. She wants MORE. We can practically go crazy waiting for the next installment of that lit goodness from a writer we love, and it’s heartbreaking when we’ve reached the end of a series. Like saying good bye to an old friend that’s come along with you on your journey; or more accurately, you’ve come along with them on theirs. Either way, you’ve connected with the heart of that story and you want more of it–plain and simple. Don’t believe me?

Series Strength

I rest my case. However, I think we’re on the same side of the gavel here so I know you’ll be as excited as I was to check out Barnes & Noble’s website for License to Spill, the second installment in the Pretenders series, and to see they’ve leaked a little more of the story for Lisi’s readers to devour. Want the first 24 pages and missed the reveal? Here you go. Want more? Thought so. License to Spill drops June 24th. We’re in the home stretch!

Lisi will be back next week with her usual post. We spoke this morning and she said she misses you guys. We’d love to see more of you here on the blah-g. What would you like to see more of each week?



Leaking the Spill

The countdown to Pretenders 2 is AWN!! License To Spill drops June 24th and all of your questions will be answered. I know many of you were outraged by the cliffhanger at the end of book one. I get it. You were left there to dangle and the drop was steep. If the drop were an actress it would be named Meryl Steep. If it had a few girlfriends stay over night it would be a steepover. If it was the title of an Adele song it would be Rolling in The Steep.

License to Spill

Naturally you sent your angry reviews to me because you don’t know who X-Phonie is. But I made sure X responded to them. So the second book opens with a letter from our journal-leaker. In it, X explains why book one ended so abruptly. Believe it or not, this unscrupulous bugger actually has a plan. And considering the circumstances, I don’t feel guilty leaking it.

Leaking to Spill


To know me, even a little, is to know that I detest all things cliche. Cliches are lazy and uninspired. They do not make the world go around (oops, that was a cliche) they make the world yawn. I don’t use them in my novels and I don’t use them when I’m buying gifts. Red roses for Valentine’s Day? Don’t insult me! A tie for Dad on Father’s Day? Only if I want him to cancel my birth certificate. And I will not give Mom a seasonal bouquet and then drag her to prix fix brunch this Sunday. That said, I’m not sure how I’m going to honor Shaila G. this Mother’s Day. The point it, I’m going to put some serious thought into it because our first ideas are rarely the original ones. And while being a mom isn’t original, being MY mom is. So I’m going to make like a booger-loving index finger and dig deep. You might want to do the same.

Here are some of my ideas:


Write a list of the top ten coolest things mom did for you this year. Remember, think like that booger-loving index finger. Don’t rattle off the obvious things like, you cook great meals or you drive me to soccer practice.  Try: You drew a happy face on an orange when I had a fever. You watched my soccer practice on that rainy afternoon even though you just got a fab blowout. Think like a writer and capture the details.


I’m going to tell you something real. It might hurt but you need to know. You know what mom really wants? A day to herself. No curfew. No responsibility. No kids! So surprise her by catering to her every need on Saturday and cut her loose on Sunday. Trust me on this. She’ll love it.


Get her tickets to a play or concert you know she’ll love. Give her the tix on Mother’s Day even though the event isn’t taking place that day. It will give her something to look forward to and will remind her that you want to celebrate her every day. It’s the gift that keeps on giving.


She kept your skin supple while you were a wee thing. So pay it forward without the pesky paying part and DIY her a spa day. (Then see the part where I tell you she wants to be alone and scram so she can enjoy it.)

DIY a yoga eye pillow filled with lavender or chamomile for her and give her silence for the day. 
* Homemade flavored lip gloss tutorial
* Homemade fizzy bath salts tutorial
* Homemade lavender bath salts tutorial
* Homemade hand and foot cream ingredients


Mom wouldn’t be a mom if she wasn’t nagging you to get rid of something she doesn’t approve of. A crusty old pair of jeans, that orange eyeshadow, a way too mini miniskirt… Sit her down on the couch, give her a bowl of popcorn, dim the lights, and cue her favorite song. Then destroy that thing she hates in front of her very eyes. Unless it’s your boyfriend. Destroy him in private then show her the video.

No matter what you choose, show mom you care by NOT buying her flowers and taking her to a prix fix brunch. It’s the least you can do.





Mom’s Day Gift Guide – 0/1

I know what you’re thinking. No blah-g again today? I had to run. But I haven’t forgotten you. The post is half written so be sure to check back tomorrow when it goes up. Alisha and I are devising a special Mother’s Day gift list just for you. None of the cliche stuff either; these are gifts mom’s going to love.